From Trauma to Transformation: Exploring the Impact of Trauma Exposure
by Ashley Gregory, LMFT
WHAT IS VICARIOUS TRAUMA?
The term “vicarious traumatization” arose in the mid-1990’s when Laurie Anne Pearlman and Paula S. Mac Ian studied the effects of working with traumatized clients on therapists. They defined it as “a transformation in the helper’s inner experience, as a result of empathetic engagement with traumatized clients and their traumatic experiences, coupled with a commitment or responsibility to help.” Since then, conversations and awareness around “secondary” or “vicarious” trauma have increased and expanded. The sheer number of blogs, Instagram posts and YouTube videos about self-care and mental health has injected these terms into more spaces than before.Yet, at the same time, deeply held beliefs, values and cultural practices maintain the very structures that keep people guessing about whether they are qualified to deserve the care they need as caregivers themselves. I would argue that this is especially true for those of us in the “caring professions'' or folks doing “care work.” In fact, minimizing one’s own experience, as a person exposed to the trauma of others, is itself a trauma exposure response.
MY OWN VICARIOUS TRAUMA JOURNEY
As a twenty-something youth worker, I had no idea how to identify trauma symptoms. Furthermore, I did not understand how the trauma I was exposed everyday to would impact me and the work I did. The organization I worked for essentially hired me to make sure a dozen or more middle schoolers would do their homework right after a long day at school. The school was in the Fruitvale District of Oakland. I had not grown up in Oakland--in fact, I had recently moved there, pretty much straight out of college. Many of my colleagues at the time were also young white people who did not reflect the makeup of the community in which we were working--predominantly Black, Latinx and Asian American and Pacific Islander. Schools like the one where I worked were essentially training grounds for young, predominately white professionals to get their hours and leave to pursue their careers elsewhere. Racist and classist demands on time and money present significant barriers to people of color who want to become teachers. Racist and classist tax laws keep schools woefully underfunded, which means mental health care staff and programs designed to support young people’s emotional well-being are rarely prioritized. With so much going in their lives and so much of their lives spent at school, the trauma exposure these youth experienced played out in the cafeteria, the hallways and their classes. My after-school classroom was no exception. While I loved working with young people, I also became angry, hopeless and guilty. At some point, the school social worker mentioned “vicarious trauma.” Suddenly my experience had a name and I was floored. Over time, it was learning the complex and personalized symptoms of vicarious trauma that helped me develop the tools, practices and rituals I needed to achieve balance and ease.
TRAUMA STEWARDSHIP AND THE WARNING SIGNS OF TRAUMA EXPOSURE RESPONSE
Part of my own journey has been aligned with the practice of “trauma stewardship,” the term Laura van Dernoot Lipky coined as she navigated her own experiences of trauma exposure. In her book Trauma Stewardship: An Everyday Guide to Caring for Self While Caring for Others, van Dernoot Lipky interviews people in a wide range of professions and from diverse backgrounds about their personal journeys and trauma stewardship wisdom. She adds to the literature of vicarious trauma and explores the warning signs of a trauma exposure response. While some of the warning signs of trauma exposure response may be more obvious behaviors, such as developing an addiction, others are not as clear. For example, one of the warning signs of trauma exposure response is a sense of persecution, an “internal state,” van Dernoot Lipky shares, when “We become convinced that others are responsible for our well-being and that we lack the personal agency to transform our circumstances” (p. 93). These internal shifts can be confusing and complicated to name without support.
While everyone metabolises trauma exposure different, there are commonly experienced symptoms, some of which include:
Exhaustion on every level--mental, physical and emotional
Intrusive thoughts of disturbing images you’ve heard about or seen at work
Nightmares
Hypervigilance
Grandiosity
A sense that you can never do enough
GETTING HELP
Working with a therapist who has awareness of and experience with vicarious trauma can help you identify how trauma exposure responses show up in your life. Awareness is the first step towards making lasting change. With the support of a therapist, you can create new ways to relate to yourself and others with renewed compassion.
Pearlman, L.A., & Mac Ian, P. S. (1995). Vicarious traumatization: An empirical study of the effects of trauma work on trauma therapists. Professional Psychology: Research and Practice, 26(6), 558.
